So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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