My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
