Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
