I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
