A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
