you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
