Midget sex pt 2 tonight
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize
