I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize