I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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