this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
So much rum. So many feels.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
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