I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
So squirting runs in the family.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
