think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
