doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
