I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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