Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize