covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
