Well apparently he's into motor boating.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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