her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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