you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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