i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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