We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize