Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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