do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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