She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
