Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I want her autograph on my taint
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
