wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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