Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize