how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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