They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
