Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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