actually, I'm a sock model
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Someone came in the potted fern
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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