Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize