Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
