There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Randomize
