just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize