I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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