told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize