Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Randomize
