we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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