I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
