Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
