I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
