Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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