id be glad to
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I want her autograph on my taint
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
