I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
