I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
