I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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