I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
smell my finger.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize