The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
