i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
