okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
