eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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